Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Mistresses Anonymous Meeting tonight!!

Dear Sisters of the Mistresshood,

First of all, I will be holding an emergency MA support group session tonight at 5.30pm EST for any of you who can get in there. After hearing so many sad stories from so many of you at this time of year, I can see it is necessary.

Secondly, many of you have complained to me about the new look MA chat room layout, and with good reason. I totally agree with you. The chat room screen is now too small and, also, we can't see the list of who is in the room at any given time - which is not cool at all. So, for now, until I refine things even more, please use this link which will take you back to how things used to be in there. Oh how we like familiarity eh :-)

Also, I must apologize for my absence at MA for a while, but I have been crazy busy and now literally just got back from Dublin where I was filming a talk show. I plan to be there for you all as much as I can now, as this is the worst time of year for 'practicing Mistresses' and complacent ex-Mistresses - i.e. Christmas!

There is a chapter in my book, "Surviving Christmas as a Mistress, and other holidays," but it is hard none the less, so I will be here for you, with an emphasis starting from now and - up to and including - Christmas day :-)

I also want to welcome all the new Sisters of the Mistress hood that have written to me since seeing me on the Dr. Phil show on Monday. I hope you will join us too.

Hope to see you later

Sarah J x


Anonymous said...

glad you will be back in chat, holidays are the worst, I told my MM that my shrink wants us to seperate for one month. no communication, told him she thinks my weight gain is totally related to the stress of the relationship. he readily agreed to not see me for a month in hopes the weight would come off. (rolls eyes.)
(I dont even see a shrink) now I'm the one who is lying....

it will be nice to NOT see him or: it will be nice NOT to be "hoping,wishing, begging" to see him thru the holidays. freedom from false hope. it feels good

sarah J. Symonds said...

Hey ...where do you write to me from? Are you able to come to the MA meet later? Yes I agree that the freedom is key.. to be away from that addiction to the false, empty, holding pattern of hope is...priceless!!

Sarah J x

sarah J. Symonds said...

Hey Mistress to the professional gotta write me back you are killing me by keeping me in suspenders LOL.

Hope to hear from you at


Anonymous said...

I am on day 2 without communication with my MM. I am at my friends house across the street from him. Well, we were neighbors before I left my husband and home down the street. I have to get out of my apartment--his clubhouse for getting after it. He haunts me there. So I am here with my Jewish mother, sharing dinner, crafts, movies and holiday cheer. I am wondering about him but being able to write to you has helped. Thank you sisters for being here and I am sorry to the sister I have betrayed.

N. said...

Sarah I saw you on Dr. Phil as well. Those 2 shows had such an effect on me that I ended it with my MM last night. I am hoping to do a MA meeting with you as soon as I can. I feel liberated, but I know that there will be hard times to come. Thank you for being part of what snapped my mind back into reality (and thanks to Tiger Woods as well. Ha!)

Sarah (Anon) said...

I was a mistress for 3 years and I ended it in Feb this year.
And now i have a nice boyfriend - and it's going fine but i have no idea how to be a girlfriend! So i hope i don't stuff it up. I can't believe how nice it is, he's coming for Xmas, I'm meeting his family too. We are spending New Year's Eve together.
I feel like I've never had a sweetheart before - and i'm 39!!!
I consciously don't compare my boyfriend with my ex, but only in this holiday season - it's really obvious to me what wasn't apparent when i was immersed with my ex, how neglected i really was.
I don't miss it one bit.

Anonymous said...

Been with my MM for a little over two years. Surviving holiday/Christmas season #3 while he is on vacation in the snow with his wife. I am also married but so emotionally out of it. 2 kids still at home and I know 2010 will be my time to leave this marriage. I fell in love with this MM and feel so stuck. Ruins every Christmas for me, and I know I have to be the one to end it for my own sanity but I haven't yet found the strength.

Anonymous said...

Dear Sarah, DR Phil's show just aired on South Africa's SABC 2 Channel. I happened to be sick today and could not go to work. Hence; I watched the show. I am and still believe that I am an honest man, a gentlemen, truth – is important to me, yet, I am very open minded to matters related to social. I think Dr Phil crucified you, however; I do believe that you asserted yourself in a manner that men like me’ could comprehend your feelings, desires and hurt resulting in the very reason, these things are happening to you all. I have never ever cheated on any women in my entire life. I married a beautiful women I believe to this day was part of my journey. I still believe that infidelity is a choice, but being a full blown drug addict once (during my marriage), I understand your argument of men lying to such an extent that you DO NOT know whether we are lying or not. I have been separated for almost 2 years now, never cheated though. I only went out to look for women (of which I found) many times to fill that void “after she left” that you all were talking about. My wife said she loved me, but she never showed it to me, she thought that her buying a car, or ensuring that weekends we get to go watch a movie was what I wanted. Hell NO! I wanted love; that is why I married her with the intensions that I will love her forever and grow old with her. I agree with you that the moment our wives in the 21t century do not act in accordance with what makes a man love a women based on her appearance, emotional intelligence, and the way she conducts herself socially will ultimately be the demise of any marriage. I believed in marriage once before. I do not anymore as a result of what happened in my marriage. The point I am trying to make is that, I understand what you are going through, but also believe that you have choices in life. Take it from my side; I went through all this hurt with my wife leaving me knowing that I had a hand full of beautiful women wanting me DURING MY MARRIAGE but I choose in love to my wife and the sanctimony of marriage NOT TO PERSUE! It is a choice. I then after months of living in my marital home (hoping she would return) left the house. 2 years later, I now live at the coast, back in corporate, still single hoping for new love, but am happy. Think about your happiness. Infidelity is as much an addictions as drugs. It all makes us unhappy. MAKE that decision to find the right single man from day one, and slowly UNIVERSALLY you shall remove yourself from the old practices that you normally find yourself in; and live and a long life with a man that will adore you. After all, you are a beautiful women; what is stopping you in finding love the old fashioned way? THINK ABOUT THIS QUESTION. I had no desire to go back to my wife, because I knew I was unhappy with her. The relevance of my situation with yours is very much the same, if we look good for you, then we DESIRE you; to look good for us, this keeps us wanting you more and more every single day. The importance however; for me- is that MEN will cheat if they feel unhappy in their marriage. Been there, wanted to do that! (and I have morels and principles), she however, just left. In a nutshell I understand what you are trying to say. I am 32 years old, with a bright future at the coast lying a head for me, your show on Dr Phil, confirmed to me the man I really am, and that is gentle to the feelings of a women. We as men, just wish sometimes it could be the same vice versa. Go well.