Thursday, September 6, 2012
Do you REALLY need the plus one in your life??
Sisters, and even brothers,
I want to talk to you today about staying in the wrong relationships. WHY do it?? Since my show aired last week, I have heard it all. Emails from women involved with married men who said they were 'unhappy at home' (*rolls eyes*) and one today even, from a Mistress who believed her married man to have filed for separation...not only did she just find out he filed incorrectly, and hence is still married (*yawn*) but his wife came over to confront her and the wife is heavily pregnant!!!!! Why do these TWO women stay with this cheating narcissitic individual??
We are all looking to love and be loved, I get that, but we have to respect ourselves and know that it is wrong on all levels to just stay with the wrong person for the sake of it, the person who does not make you happy. Whether it be because you feel you can't be alone, or that you feel you just have to have a 'somebody' in your life. No, you don't. You will survive, and you will be better off alone than with the wrong person who may be draining you and rotting you to your very core.
So today's message is love yourself first. Put yourself first. Anyone who wants to be with you should be open, honest, and upfront. Lets keep the liars, cads, and cheats at bay.
Stay strong you all, and live a happy life not a crappy life!
Peace
Sarah J. xo
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9 comments:
Sarah I fell in love with a man who was a skunk, but it took me a while to see that. These men get invovled with women with low self-esteem. Even if we don't want to admit it to ourselves, we don't think much of ourselves if we allow him to have his cake and eat it too, while we settle for the crumbs. I see him now and think, what the hell was I thinking. I'm glad to be rid of him and if it means I'm alone well so be it. At one point I thought I'd rather be miserable with him than without, but the fact is, I don't want to be miserable at all. I am not now, and I'm so glad you were brave enough to come out of the mistress closet so to speak. Love your show.
Hi Sarah, thank you very much for being your open and honest self! I began being the other woman at the beginning of the summer. Once my feeling stared to deepen for him in the past few weeks, i started to be panicked and paranoid. this week, I saw your show on Lifetime and realized that the only person that would truly be demolished emotionally in this relationship would be me. Last night I told him it was over. I stood my ground, and now, through all the tears this morning, I know without a doubt that I'm way better off being without this man. Thanks again, I know I'll be feeling as right as rain soon. I respect myself and what can be better than that?
Hey Sarah,
Thanks to your stupid show, my girlfriend asked me this morning (on our 12th anniversary) if I had another girlfriend.
We're in a dry spell, sexually because I'm on anti-depressants. Have never cheated on her. I hate watching the little interviews of guys on your show talk about cheating. Like every guy wants to cheat.
I love my partner more and more everyday. Now, she's worried I'm cheating on her - because of comments you've made on your show about "no sex".
So thanks a lot. Maybe I'll off myself.
Hi Sarah, I'm not the "other woman" but the blindsided wife. I watch your show, and I was deeply affected by the one I watched last night, where the other woman had a baby with the married man. That's what happened to me! She seriously thought that if she got pregnant he would leave me, her plan backfired.
It amazes me what these women will do, and it doesn't matter who they hurt in the way. She thinks her child is more important than our children...
Love your show. Hope it helps some women, and men, wake up.
Sarah,
I would like to hear more of your mistress-proofing a marriage. Many men feel that if their wife has begun to ignore them, not interested in sex, or gives excuses for not having sex, that they, the men have the right to cheat.
How is that different from the woman you endorsed cheating on her husband because he was disabled?
I was involved with my married man for 1.5yrs. I cut it off with him and phone his wife to tell her.
A very messy way to end it, but this was the only way I could break the addiction. He is pissed and will never forgive me. That's ok because he deserved it and now I can finally move on.
Hi Sarah I just heard about you this morning on kiis fm and liked your advice. It got me thinking about a lot of stuff. I've been with a married man for now 6 1/2 yrs and feel lonely and worthless most of time. I am only 33 but as he puts it I have a lot of bagage I have 5 kids frm my previous marriage he swears that's the only reason he won't leave his wife. but my thing is I can't change that so I know I'm wasting my time. My fear is being alone who's gona want a divorced woman with 5 kids . how do I move on.
Whoa... I don't think those meds are working:/
To the lady with 5 kids. You don't seem like the unremorseful and even boastful whores that I've dealt with that either took a boyfriend from me or caused me to leave one. I know you feel low already and are hurting. But all you are doing is hurting yourself and allowing that man to use you to hurt his wife. You feel sad? Think how the wife feels or will feel if she doesn't already know. Don't be that woman. Have some standards for yourself for god sakes. Men are pigs. They will do what you allow them to do. It will be hard, but be alone. Maybe you will be luckier than me and find a nice single man. I was married once. I left cause he kept cheating on me with young and even under 18 girls and beating me up. I also had a boyfriend the same after that, and another one that was just a cheater. I've been lucky to come out of these relationships without getting HIV or any unwanted pregnancies. Birthcontrol is a girls best friend. Condoms are not enough by themselves. USE BIRTHCONTROL. , you have a lot of kids already. Protect yourself. I've blamed myself and thought myself a loser. But I have gotten confirmation from friends male and female that it's not me. Im a jerk magnet, and that part of it is me. There's something about me that attracts those kind of men. That's what I have to work on. I did do all I can in the bedroom dept., and taking care of my man, in all ways. It was never enough. The last boyfriend left because I wouldn't pay his bills anymore, and he liked the casual sex and of course the drugs and alcohol he became involved with from her because he was weak. I still love him but have not spoken to him in 5 months, and I won't call him. I have to stay strong. He wanted me and his drug whore. That's not going to happen. It's just me or not me at all. and NO DRUGS. I don't need that trouble in my life. I have been propositioned by many a married man. I will NEVER be the other woman. No matter how bad I feel about myself or how low my self esteem is. BECAUSE I know how it feels to have a slutty unremorseful, braggart, take my man, and rub it in my face. In my opinion those women are WORSE than the cheating men, cause they should know better. They enable the men to do what they do. Don't get me wrong those piggish men are just as guilty. BUT I have never known a man that wasn't that way. Sad but true. All of the men in my family cheated on their wives and girlfriends, except two uncles. That I know of. I mean all. My father, grandfathers, uncles, and even a couple of cousins. So all I've known are pigs. I'm sure decent men exist. I've just never met any. I would LOVE to meet a man that holds himself to a higher standard like I do, and wouldn't cheat. I've never cheated on anyone. I know how it feels to be hurt by a cheater. I have no idea if I will ever find love. It feels like only a fairytale at this point. But I would rather be alone than ever be beaten up or cheated on EVER again.
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