Sisters, first of all my apologies for not writing my blog for a while. I have been so wrapped up with traveling from London to L.A. and preparing to hold the first ever Mistresses Anonymous group meeting that I have let it slip for a while and I'm sorry for that. But I am back now, and with a passion!
I am happy to report that I held the first ever meeting today. As of today, 4th May, at 4pm, history was made and a taboo was broken. We now have our own support group, and I am determined to break the stigma of the "Other Woman." Ultimately, if married men didn't choose to break their vows by cheating on their spouses in the first place, then there would not be a need for us to provide this community service. I am sick to death of the other woman being the loser in all ways, financially, mentally and physically. We give all of ourselves for very little in return - least of all commitment!
The women who joined me today were amazing women, who just happened to be, or have been, MM addicts - settling to be with someone who can never put them first, and suffering from the emotional trauma that comes with believing in the lies, and procrastination, that a married man will use to keep you in his life - as was the case with me. I hope to empower all women to not accept being second best in life any more. It is ok to be alone you know, and isn't it better to be alone and lonely, than with the wrong guy and lonely?
I am still in recovery from my experiences which have scarred me more than I can ever tell you. Nobody held a gun to my head to stay with the man hurting me, but I was so deep into this emotionally crucifying pattern that I had not the strength to get out. That is why I will never, ever, judge any of you, whatever your circumstances. (What's next for us? Our own recovery happy house for reformed other women? Our own dating agency to help us meet decent available guys who WILL put us first?).
As women, we have to want to get out of this toxic environment for ourselves, not because someone tells us we should. Sadly, this usually means you have to hit that brick wall of pain first, to make you wake up and realize you cannot continue to live the life you are. I call this the 'wake up call,' and will be using it a lot from now on. Oprah has her AHA moment that we can all relate to, but now us mistresses have the "WUC" moment (a.k.a wake up call!) which I officially launch here on my blog as of today. I really hope that all of you will experience the WUC very soon!
Kisses
Sarah J. x
5 comments:
So happy to hear of the success of MA.
I read your book this weekend. Thank you for providing the confirmation of what the logical side of me has always known--what I give him doesn't endear him to me; it makes it easier to stay with the wife.
I took yet another baby step away from him today... When I let him go, I want it to be for good...I don't want to give in and have him view my departure as an empty threat. I want him to know I'm tired of missing him when he's playing family man...that I'm of a strong gender...that all women are.
Dear Sarah, thank you for your power and sharing yourself with each of us.
You are so awesome and so right! Can't wait to meet you and the other mistresses in LA this week. Mistresses Unite!!!
Sarah,
Is there a closed forum for your new MA? Just ended a 7 month affair with a co-worker. We've been working together for 5 years now. Both of us are married. He forgot it was my birthday yesterday! I'm feeling so empty and a little lost. :-(
Sarah,
Will there be a forum for your MA? I just recently broke off a 7 month affair with a former co-worker. We've worked together for 5 years and we were friends outside of the office. We are both married. He forgot my birthday yesterday! I'm feeling empty and a little lost.
D
Dear Birthday Mistress, that is a sure sign that your MM should be in your rear view mirror - if he forgets your birthday. I mean, Imagine if he forgot his wife's eh?!!!
There is no closed forum as such yet, but if you would like to email me privately to sarah@havinganaffairthebook.com we can figure something out. I will be starting a chatroom as soon as I can.
Sarah J.x
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